After an informal office survey, we found we have a combined female self-loathing body time on our staff of well over 100 years... and counting, unfortunately. As a brand, we celebrate the shit out of amazing women on the daily, but have come to notice that we aren’t very nice to ourselves as individuals. Things we say, as individuals, about or to ourselves would cause us to openly abhor our gal pal if she said the same thing about herself. And, so, beget this list. We have decided to turn out our old way of thinking as individuals because this list showed us what an impressive machine we are in our own right. We're a force, each of us. Here's 10 reasons why we all must adopt that viewpoint.
1. Because viewing your body as a failure everyday leads to a lot of complicated and expensive therapy
The path to self-acceptance is long and very complicated. We get it. In fact, we are on the same long, twisty path which seems to go on forever and ever; however, when you look back at the last few years, have you made progress? If not, time to reassess what’s happening. If so, keep moving and get that important soul work done as it is impeding you getting to the fact that you are a worthy investment. It’s true, we asked all of your friends and family members.
2. Because body shamers and your critics are not the ones who count
We came to the place where we asked: Can I just like my body yet? The answer is: YES. If you’ve got body shamers and critics, and they're not in the arena getting their collective asses kicked, we don't want their feedback. Watch this a sec:
3. Because you cannot breathe enough to help others, let alone yourself, when you are consumed with loathing your body
There’s nothing more real than boiling down life’s questions to: what MUST be done first to sustain the delicate balance you have created, where you are the center of the universe for probably more people than you even know, BUT, to use a very popular airplane analogy, if you do not put on your own oxygen mask before you reach over to help another, you will not actually be able to help anyone, because you will be out of the equation. When your energy and focus are taken by agonizing over thigh-gap, you aren’t breathing in the gratitude you need to fuel your life’s meaningful work.
4. Because you are ALLOWED to have/feel/spread/consume JOY
This is the classic “beat yourself up” rebuttal: you are allowed to be happy. To have and experience absolute all-consuming joy in your life. There need be no apologies for this. You deserve it for a million reasons. Turn to your best friend for the true list, because we know you are making it hard on yourself and will block all those great things about yourself that your bff will happily lay out in a very neat and complete list. Brene Brown says that joy is the “way home.” You know who are the most gorgeous people at every stage of life: joyful people. True fact.
5. Because social media is not your life’s “to-do” list or “to-be” list
In general, we spend a lot of time talking about physical strength and physical health, but much less time on mental strength and mental health. Some habits can cost you everything. Envying your friend's swimsuit photos on Facebook, or being jealous of the heavily curated (& filtered) life found in that Insta-famous quasi-celebrity's photo-feed actually causes depression and eats away at your mental strength. Disruptive beliefs rob us of our mental strength. It’s okay to be sad when something bad happens but having unhealthy beliefs about ourselves, like chronic self-pity, keeps us stuck. No one else can control you. Do not give away your power. There are very few things that you have to do. Very rarely does anything truly control you. Kicking unhealthy thinking to the curb now will help you summon the mental strength you need to work through those times that you really need it. Building mental strength is the key to reaching your greatest potential.
6. Because you have just one body, one mind; you may as well take care of them
When your body is functioning well, so is your mind; you can then produce something with your own mind. When your body is weak, the opposite is true. Understanding the body-mind relationship may not cure your physical difficulties, and it may not make you a literal genius; but repress or ignore your emotions and feel that in your gut? Your body aching? There’s a connection! From this vantage point, you can discover that there is an extraordinarily intimate two-way communication going on between body and mind that affects both your physical state and your mental and emotional health. That’s why we should take a good care of our body and pay attention to it. The body can show what, in our mind, we are unconsciously ignoring, denying, or repressing.
7. Because otherwise you shrink away from the big badass shit you were born to do
Kick your self-sabotaging patterns that keep showing up in your life! You are WORTHY! You are WORTHY! You don’t need to be approved of, you get to APPROVE yourself! There is no need to seek approval or validation from anyone else. You’re the sole member of the “goddamn it, I’m worth it” club because what really matters is how you see yourself. The relationship you have with yourself is usually the most complicated one, admittedly, doing the work we talked about up there in #1 helps you get to this place of embracing your inner badass. Woman, you are a force of nature! Now, go be that worthy AF goddess and experience the bliss that comes with loving yourself. When you look at yourself in the mirror, stop with the whole self-esteem shakedown. Instead, say right back at that gurl: “This body was approved by me, dammit.” (Or not the swear part. Whatever.)
8. Because you deserve to get what you want
“Getting what you want is simple, but notice that I didn’t say it was easy,” Mel Robbins. But first you have to stop screwing yourself over. See for yourself:
9. Because shame is not a form of motivation--it’s a psychological punishment
Not just because we say so, but because: #Science! Psychologists say, in cases where shame successfully diminishes a behavior, one should ask, “at what price?” Shame can become internalized, and the shamed person begins to view him or herself in ways consistent with the disapproval. In cases of internal shame, the individual becomes both the judged and the judge and experiences self-criticism and feelings of inadequacy. When shame is internalized and becomes pervasive and enduring, a person can be at risk for developing unhealthy conditions such as depression or social anxiety disorder, the fear of being scrutinized and the avoidance of social events that evoke such fear. As with other emotional events, feeling shamed can result in vivid long lasting memories. Shame can corrupt an expression of affection when a gift is belittled or dwarfed in value by comparison with others. Over time, a little shame can go a long way to harbor resentment that ultimately diminishes relationships. Drop the mic, and the shame. It’s not worth it.
10. Because your body is the ONE thing that you can touch, feel, experience every minute of your entire life. It is miraculous. Let that be ENOUGH
Seriously. Let that be ENOUGH, period.
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